My Big Fat Lesbian Divorce – Custody Of The Can Opener

In attorneys, Break-up, children, civil unions, court, Crying, Current events, dating, Divorce, domestic, family, gay, gay marriage, grief, homosexuality, kisses, law enforcement, Lesbian, lgbt, Love, Marriage, movies, news, parenting, portland oregon, promises, relationships, single, vows, women on April 17, 2011 at 2:45 pm

I’ve been cleaning today, something she swore I never did enough of. I’d like to say that I did as much as I could, in addition to all the other things I do in a day.

I can hear her now “I work a job, and I’m hardly home.” True, but just because I don’t work outside of the home, doesn’t mean I always have the time to do everything. In fact, there are days I’ve remembered to eat, around 10pm.

But that’s not the point of this need to write today.

I was doing dishes, and realized I need to start packing up her dishes. Slowly phase them out, not to make too many changes for the boys.

Then I started thinking about how I got rid of items, because she told me not to worry about it. That she either had, or would replace it for us. I came up here trusting her and a lot of promises she made. Now, I’ve got to figure out how to start separating the kitchen utensils.

I gotta figure out a lot of things now, and arguing over who owns the can opener seems so small in comparison. But I’m also trying to process how someone could make so many promises to five people, have us come to depend on her word, then just leave us figuring how we’re going to make ends meet.

When she first asked me to marry her, the plan was she was going to move to the little town I lived in. She was going to use the marriage to apply for a hardship transfer to another prison near me. I thought “OK”..

It was literally the day after we married that she “decided” she didn’t want to move. She told me if I moved up here, that there would be help with child care if we needed it, promises to help with expenses, provide and make sure the boys and I never wanted for anything. I expressed my concerns that my cost of living would go up, but income wouldn’t. But, she gave me her word and promised it would be OK. If I didn’t trust her or have believed her, I never would have married her or moved myself and my children up here.

Now, I’m wondering who gains custody of household items, and how I’m going to make ends meet next month.

If I ever title this blog My Next Big Fat Lesbian Marriage, please feel free to leave colorful comments regarding my sanity.

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