lesbianspaghetti

Archive for August, 2011|Monthly archive page

My Big Fat Lesbian Divorce – My Wedding Ring

In Blog, Break-up, cancer, children, christian, civil unions, court, Crying, Current events, dating, Divorce, Facebook, family, fashion, gay, God, grief, health, homosexuality, Law, Lesbian, lgbt, Love, Marriage, New York, Pain, Politics, portland oregon, relationships, religion, single, Uncategorized, wedding, Wedding Ring, women on August 21, 2011 at 11:09 pm

I am now stuck with this ring, that once was supposed to signify the never ending love between my ex and myself (I almost laugh audibly as I write that).

I want to get rid of it, and I have contemplated tossing it into the ocean. Though that seems like such a waste. I mean, it is a pretty ring.

I remember when she gave it to me on our “wedding” day. We were parked in front of the fountain in Centeral Park (not the Centeral Park, but the one in my small town), almost in the same exact spot where we shared out first kiss. It seemed like such a romantic spot and the right place to exchange rings.

Who knew that spot would not only be the place I received the kiss of her romantic death, but also the ring to bind it.

I wonder if this is how Frodo felt while packing around the ring that forced him from the security The Shire and into the cold reality of The Middle Earth.

My Big Fat Lesbian Divorce – 4 Months

In attorneys, Ben and Jerrys Ice Cream Comfort, blogging, Break-up, cancer, children, christian, civil unions, clothing, coat hangers, court, Crying, Current events, current events, dating, Divorce, domestic, family, fashion, gay, God, grief, health, homosexuality, Law, law enforcement, Lesbian, Lesbian Relationships, lgbt, Love, love, Marriage, military, movies, news, Pain, parenting, people, Politics, portland oregon, relationships, Relationships, religion, school, single, sleep, Uncategorized, vows, wedding, women on August 20, 2011 at 1:51 am

August 4th came and went. It marked a couple of dates that are significant, but I’ve been so busy living, that I totally let it slip by.

While I understand this is a good thing, proof that my life has continued just fine, I am wishing I had taken total advantage and used it to mark a celebration of sorts. However, it’s never really too late to celebrate getting rid of crap, so I have planned a purging celebration to take place. Getting rid of anything to do with her, or anything she has given me.

August 4th marked the 4th month since I had her asked to leave, but it also marked the anniversary of our first date. The date lasted 10 hours, and took place mostly walking around downtown and talking. We had spent so much time chatting, that both of us had extended past the meters and both of us received a parking ticket that afternoon, on our vehicles. I came across the ticket that I had received, I saved it just for the sentiment of it all. But that has become a part of the purge and I no longer want anything. I want no remnants of that day, anything to remind me that it even happened.

I suppose that might sound like I am trying to erase the past, and dealing with the past is far more healthier than just pretending it didn’t happen. But I am in no shortage of constant reminders that I was married to her. I guess it is like packing a bag. When you have too much to close it, you either find a way to shove it all in and zip up the bag, or you dump the excess.

I am dumping the excess.

I’ve also had her creditors calling and asking for her. She is apparently not answering their calls, so they are instead, calling me. I’ve asked them to please remove my number from their databases, so here is hoping they will.

When I met her, her credit was a mess. I worked my bum off to help get her credit cleaned up so she could buy a house. But the first time she actually decided to try and handle her bank account on her own, she managed to put it in the red. I can actually pin that to the date, because I was shocked when I saw she made a purchase that she couldn’t afford. I completely stopped helping her that day, and ever since then she has tried to pin the blame on me for the mess her life was becoming. Denial of personal used to cause so many of our problems.

It’s weird, I’ve been thinking about that… the denial thing. She could literally stand in front of me, say something or do something, then completely deny it within seconds. It was soooooo weird…. Like, the jewelry.

Since she has been gone, I have found that there was more that I wasn’t told all the details of. I would like to say I was surprised, or even completely shocked, when I found out. But I wasn’t.

I am becoming more and more thankful that I am no longer with that woman. I have seen things for what they really were (and were not) the void has been replaced with a feeling of liberation and salvation.

Which makes this song so perfect for my thoughts today.. Milli Vanilli.. A group as fake as her love was, lypsynching lyrics about putting the blame on anything other than where it should truly fall. Perfect.

http://youtu.be/rB0Le3oM1b8

My Big Fat Lesbian Divorce – My Son Is In The Hospital

In blogging, Break-up, cancer, children, christian, Crying, Current events, current events, dating, Divorce, family, gay, God, grief, health, homosexuality, Lesbian, lgbt, Love, Marriage, military, news, Pain, parenting, people, Politics, portland oregon, relationships, religion, single, wedding, women on August 9, 2011 at 6:17 pm

I heard from my son last night. He’s arrived safely to the hospital, and in a room. 

He said that he’ll see a Plastic Surgeon for reconstructive surgery next week, but has to see the General Surgeon first. No word on the Oncologist. 

In something unrelated, I saw this article on CNN today and my heart went out to this young man and his family.

(I’m having trouble posting the story, but it’s titled “Kansas boy wants the world to recognize his fallen father”)

Here is the link:

http://m.cnn.com/primary/_hXbHlw-ig7CdShR7

My Big Fat Lesbian Divorce – Coat Hangers. What More Can I Say?

In attorneys, Break-up, civil unions, clothing, coat hangers, court, Crying, Current events, dating, Divorce, domestic, family, fashion, gay, gay marriage, God, grief, health, homosexuality, Law, law enforcement, Lesbian, lgbt, Love, Marriage, news, parenting, Politics, portland oregon, promises, relationships, religion, single, sleep, Uncategorized, vows, wedding, women on August 6, 2011 at 12:12 am

I’ve been given some hysterical suggestions regarding the 40 white (plastic) coat hangers that my ex paid her attorney to request possession of (I’m still amused by that fact) along with a few other trivial items (a blender blade, and some silverware amongst the request)

Think about it… Attorney writing request for plastic white coat hangers and a few items vs. The Dollar Store to purchase new ones….

Hys-ter-ic-al

The following suggestions were made to me, purely for comic relief:

Return all black ones with a note that they better match her soul.

Give her all wire hangers.

Agree to return only 15 hangers, but none of the white ones. Then see how long I can drag out negotiations.

Send her 4.00.

Send 5 plastic, along with 35 wire with no hooks.

Along with these suggestions, I was sent the following photo via text from a friend. I think it would make a lovely default pic.

20110807-043708.jpg

My Big Fat Lesbian Divorce – No Wire Hangers!

In Ben and Jerrys Ice Cream Comfort, blogging, Break-up, christian, civil unions, clothing, coat hangers, court, Crying, Current events, current events, dating, Divorce, domestic, family, fashion, gay, gay marriage, God, grief, homosexuality, Law, Lesbian, Lesbian Relationships, lgbt, Love, love, Marriage, movies, news, Pain, parenting, people, Politics, portland oregon, promises, relationships, Relationships, religion, sex, single, sleep, vows, wedding, women on August 2, 2011 at 10:57 pm

I got an e/mail from my now official “ex”.

The ex is now requesting the return of some items, despite the court order actually gives me possesion of all the items that remained in the home, unless otherwise specified.. (there were no items specified)

Amongst the requests? ..

(wait for it)

40 plastic coat hangers, all white, no colors.

I just can’t make this shit up..